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Posts Tagged ‘ survival ’

Surviving Valentine’s Day with a Broken Heart

Monday, February 9th, 2009

I have never been a big fan of V.D. (my inside joke and nickname for Valentine’s Day – always makes me chuckle…) It’s a completely manufactured holiday by Hallmark and the florists, but still it is there.   And if you are alone – well, this holiday really magnifies that reality in sometimes frightening questions.  (Don’t you have a Valentine?  Why am I alone?  What’s wrong with me?)   STOP!  Take a breath – it’s 24 hours – pull yourself together and give these tips a try…

 1.  Reality check – this day shall pass.  Gratefully the day falls on a Saturday, so if you work in an office, school or the like – you do not have to see the relentless parade of delivered flowers and chocolates.  Mantra – this day shall pass.

2.  Make a plan.  Maybe you want to stay under the covers all day, but I encourage you to get together with friends and go bowling or ice skating – anything completely out of your norm.  Do something that takes you attention and focus off whatever negative spiral you are in.  It will distract you from “poor me” thinking and who knows who is ice skating today…

3.  Humor – if you are in a pitiful state, try to find just a little humor.  Watch silly movies, call friends who make you laugh…anything that can get you giggling will help you move through your emotions.

4.  Go outside.  Take a walk or go for a drive if it is too cold, but get out of the four-walls closing in!  A change of scenery will allow you to stop the incessant thinking of, “What did I do wrong?  Why me?  Will I ever be happy again?”  I promise you will feel better and be happy again (you were before, so why not?)

5.  Big girls/boys do cry.  It’s ok to be sad.  The tears do eventually dry up.  Just remember your tears are a wave, maybe of the tsunami variety, but a wave – you are the vast ocean.  Waves pass and the ocean remains.

6.  Get a new haircut, outfit and/or bedding.  Have you ever noticed how many people look better a few months after a break-up?  This is the upside of the break-up diet, i.e. can’t eat due to depression and sleeplessness.  As the song goes – wash that man (woman) out of your hair…your bed too.

7.  Buy yourself flowers and chocolate – the day before.  Whether you’re heart-broken or attached – don’t wait for someone else to tell you, “I love you, I value you.”  Do it yourself – then anything else that comes your way is gravy.   

 *Remember this is one day – 24 hours – this too shall pass…Happy bowling – don’t forget your socks! 

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