You know this club. You can pick them out in any bar or social function. It’s the life is so-bad club. You can recognize the members because they are always talking about how hard things are. They never have enough time for themselves because of all the things they are doing for their kids, spouse, job, co-workers, boss, family, friends…However they DO have enough time to tell you how difficult things are, yet no solutions fall from their lips, just complaining words…

Not surprisingly each of us finds our way into this club at some time. We don’t usually intend to be a part of this club, but somehow the dynamics of a group or a single friendship deteriorates into this place. What began as voicing a concern, becomes a negative focus. Maybe the group begins whining about work or a friend complains about a sagging relationship, but it doesn’t stop there with letting off steam, it becomes relentless. It’s all you discuss – how bad it is…

When you discover yourself in this group – stop. Don’t blame anyone else, you got yourself here, now how to get out? Detach.

The reason you are in this negative dynamic now is because you feel power-less and you are stuck in a bad habit of thinking. For now, try to distance yourself from this group or friendship quietly and create some space for yourself. What are you afraid of? Are there solutions that you haven’t considered? Do you need a change?

Detachment may seem uncomfortable or even impossible for you, but do you really want to complain your life away? I think not. It could be the problem you are facing is too big for you to find your way through alone. Maybe you do need support, but it has to be healthy. You could try reaching out to a trusted friend or even someone like me, a life coach and begin setting goals to create the life you deserve. Instead of letting others or a group mentality keep you in a less-than place, make a different choice. For happiness is no far off shore, it’s closer then you think, just waiting for you to step into…

Today I invite you to stop complaining.  When I turn on the TV or radio, I hear the suffering of thousands in Haiti.  These people who had literally nothing have even less today.  It is heart-breaking as well as stunningly unfair.  You may wonder, where can God be?

 He is there, has been there all along with the least among us.  He has been working through the hands of aid workers and UN peacekeepers, but the need is so great. 

 Later in the day yesterday I heard someone complain about driving in the snow, and another ringing with work stress…I thought – what luxury.  We have the luxury of complaint – finding problems where often there is none.  We have the luxury to worry about everything because our basic needs are met.  We have shelter, food and education, we are blessed by the country we were born into…

 Thus today, try not to complain.  Just focus on the blessing of where you are…There is food, clean water, available doctors, shelter, so much more than our brothers and sisters in Haiti, not to mention much of the rest of the world. 

 If you are reading this – you are blessed.  You may feel lost, alone.  You may even be suffering and you are still blessed. 

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