This guided meditation focuses on connecting to your ideal body. There is no perfect number, but there is a feeling of satisfaction. This meditation offers support as you transform into your ideal self emotionally and physically. Enjoy!
Here are just a few tips to make this summer fantastic…
1.Picnic and concert/play.I began going to outside plays and concerts when I was a kid with my Mom.I try to go at least once a summer now.Big blanket, yummy food, setting sun and art – could there be anything better?
2.Beach.Whether you go to the ocean, a lake or even a stream – get to a beach.I don’t care how old you are – take your shoes off and dig your toes in the sand and suddenly you are a kid again.If you really want to feel good, build a sand castle and feel the years slip away as you play…
3.Book.Reading is a way to travel and explore without leaving the comfort of your hammock.If you are looking for an excellent to read this summer – check out my book reviews where you can find anything from hysterically funny (Me talk Pretty One Day) to self-help (The Power of Intention) to lyrical (The God of Small Things.)
4.A garden.Ok, it could just be a small pot with some pansies or a massive vegetable garden, but grow something.Digging in the dirt is calming your nerves and your soul.And best of all – it’s addictive…I check on all my flowers every morning just to see who has bloomed today and this year, I am even going to grow lettuce on our deck – my own economic recession garden…
5.Camping.Try going camping for a night and don’t forget the smores fixings!A camp fire is good for anyone’s soul and if you are a newbie at camping or haven’t been for a very long time – you are guaranteed to create memories that last…Just setting up the tent can afford opportunities to laugh for hours…
6.Forgive.Learn to forgive someone this summer – make up with a friend or family member that you feel estranged.Guess what?They feel just as crappy about having you missing from their life as you feel having them out of yours.So send a funny card, make a phone call or even send an email – almost everyone longs to be forgiven and bought whole again.Make it happen for you and maybe you will now have someone to camping with…
7.Summer Music.I listen to IZ during the summer or any time I want to feel like I am on vacation.If you haven’t started already, begin listening to “happy” music – anything that makes you feel light inside.Reggae is always a happy choice.
8.Go skinny-dipping.Nothing says summertime more then skinny-dipping.Find a secluded spot and jump in – your body will thank you by feeling completely and joyfully alive.
9.Pot Lucks.I love getting together with friends, but can’t afford to throw as many parties as I would like – answer: pot lucks!Everyone bring something and the party has begun with little financial investment from you.Best of all – your guests will love it.Instead of bringing a hostess gift, they can skip the flowers and bring something they like.Everyone’s happy.
10.Fall in love.Falling in love is not just reserved for singles, I have been married almost ten years and joyfully I fall in love with my husband over and over…Maybe as we have a picnic or lay in the hammock entwined and reading or dig our toes in the sand or even, when we forgive each other our imperfections and enjoy the beautiful life we have created together…
May these tips spark your own heart and help you to create a wonderful summer ahead.Enjoy!
All of my life I have battled perfect – being perfect, not being perfect, expecting others to be perfect, wondering what is perfect…on and on the thoughts unravel…I think I have mastered my driving need to be “perfect” only to have it show up somewhere else.
It is during these times I am reminded of my stumbling and bumbling through life.Things are so clear cut in my mind, but when I really step back, I view my “two-steps-forward, one-step-back jig” over and over.And in fact, I am grateful.When I see this need to be “perfect” revealed - I see my hurts, but also the hurts of those around me.Not only do I have more compassion for others, but most importantly - I have more compassion for me.
When I surrender in my battle with perfect, I discover peace and acceptance.Not a peace built on certain circumstances, events or people, but a peace with self.True peace.
Do you ever feel like you are emotionally spinning?Maybe you have just had a difficult encounter with a relative or even a friend?You may be able to identify – this person drives me nuts, but the real question is, why?Why has this person been able to affect you?Chances are you have been “triggered.”
“Triggering” happens when some hidden emotional response is activated.My in-laws are professionals at this by using guilt to trigger emotional responses.For example, my husband’s parents will “talk” about each sibling to the other siblings trying to get them to speak to each other…”Oh, so-and-so, really does want to be more involved with your life, but he just doesn’t feel like you care enough…”This is an attempt by someone on the outside to “trigger” or force events in a certain way.
Even though my in-laws intentions are to bring the family closer, their manipulations stall any positive outcomes and actually inject more distance within the family structure.
Often you can identify “triggering” by how you feel inside…When someone or something is “triggering” you, you may feel a tightness in your stomach or chest.Your breathing may change.Things may feel more emotionally intense or you may even feel cornered into a certain defensive reaction.You are being “triggered.”
Now, no matter how well-adjusted and balanced you are today, each of us gets “triggered” every now and then.The trick is not to fear being triggered, but to manage your reaction to whatever happens to illicit an emotional response.So the real trick is, how to stop triggering?
You “trigger” because some place inside of you is feeling under attack.For example, my in-laws use guilt to “trigger” the idea of “being a good son, brother – a good son would call his brothers, visit more, etc.”The fact is my in-laws miss their family and want them to be close.Instead of stating this desire or want, they use manipulation to “make” it happen.They use passive aggressive tactics to avoid themselves getting “hurt” because when you overtly state your desires and wants to others, you make yourself vulnerable.You give others choice - they can choose to say, “No, I don’t want to do that,” and then what?
So, how to get from, “they drive me crazy - triggering,” to witnessing what is really going on, i.e. the in-laws miss their family.One technique I discovered years ago is “writing with God.”
Whenever you are feeling uncertain about things or are triggering, get a few sheets of paper out and begin writing with God.
For example:
Kelly:I hate my in-laws.They f*&5ing suck.If I have to hear another passive aggressive crap out of their mouth, etc…
God: Yes, they do suck.
Kelly:Yeah, they really suck. Why are they so crazy?Who tortures grown children this way?Etc, etc…
God: Kelly, they are sad and miss something that is lost to them. Etc…
(Notice rational voice begins entering the conversation in opposition to ego-centered defensive response.)
The fact is your ego is the “triggered” response.Using this technique allows you to release all your negative thoughts and comments – your ego defense, instead of the usual biting your lip and stuffing all these words deep inside.By using this technique, you are able to release your own negative reactions, thus begin to detach and witness truth – your highest self, your God-response is brought forth.This “higher” place is present inside you right now, waiting to lift you up, but first you have to release your “triggered-ego” by acknowledging the hurt and pain that is present first.
Give it a try…you will be surprised to discover your highest self is waiting, inside you right now, waiting to help you transform your life.Your highest self is the path to happiness and peace everyday.The choice is yours.
Years ago my father introduced me to a tradition that was able to bring peace into our relationship.My parents divorced when I was about ten years old and my Dad moved south, far away from me.We really didn’t speak often as my parents had one of those horrendous divorces.I probably saw him a half a dozen times before heading to college in Burlington, VT.
Needless to say, we did not have much in common and frankly, I kept myself slightly aloof from him as he left long ago…During college he began making attempts to be a part of my life.He would take me skiing with my boyfriend, send money finally and call more often.
One memorial weekend he asked me if I would like to do the graves with him.Strangely enough that was one place we both liked to go – cemeteries.We both liked wandering around old graveyards reading headstones and admiring the artistry of the marble works.
My Dad grew up in Middlebury, VT.Most of that side of the family still lives there and our relatives are buried in several different cemeteries in the area.I agreed, not really knowing what I was getting into.He picked me up early that Sunday morning and I looked in the backseat to see all kinds of supplies – gardening tools, cups and to my surprise, chilled champagne.
We began chatting about where we were going first and my Dad started telling stories.He loves telling stories, but this time the stories were of friends he had lost in Vietnam, Uncles wounded in WWII and scandalous adventures of my family I never knew.I laughed, really laughed and I saw my father for the first time as more than the man that left.
He was flawed certainly, but he was trying.Trying to become a family again.I saw for the first time how young he was when my parents got married and I found compassion that was not there before.
At each grave we cleared away the weeds, and planted pansies and marigolds.We offered champagne toasts and funny stories to those long gone.Quietly, without knowing when, a gentle peace had slipped into my Dad and my relationship.
I finally had come to love my father again.I realized wasn’t abandoned any longer.I had found my way back to him and this family through the memories and stories of those long past.That day, together, we found peace again in pansies and laughter.This peace has made all the difference and I am grateful.
When I was nine years old I fell off a bike.It was horrible.I was flying down a hill and my flip-flops fell off.I had those pedals that had the spiky surfaces so I couldn’t put my bare feet on the pedals or risk impalement. I started panicking because my speed was increasing every moment with the descent - I had to do something fast.Thinking my best option was going onto the grass, I steered my bike to the left and hit an edge.Suddenly, I was hurling threw the air only to land on my forehead.Ouch.
Blood seemed everywhere and my wailing began.I walked down the rest of the hill to my aunt’s house, tears streaming and looking for Mom.Unfortunately, Mom was out and Dad was there.Let’s just say he was useless and leave it at that.Not surprisingly, I didn’t ride a bike again for a long time and when I did, it was a white-knuckle, tense experience.
Fast-forward to today and now I am the Mom with two kids riding bikes.My kids kept asking me to go for bike rides with them too, not just Daddy or the sitter.I would say with a shrug, “I don’t have a bike.”Then my husband bought me a beautiful purple and hot pink cruiser with a big basket.I had no more excuses, so I tried riding again.
Against every instinct I began riding my bike.My daughter and I started riding to and from her school every day and after a week or two, I noticed things were changing.I stopped gripping the handle bars for dear life.I felt more comfortable riding and most of all, I liked it again. It was fun riding on my pretty, purple bike – I felt so young again, even carefree.
Mind you, I will never wear flip-flops while biking ever again and I still don’t make a whole lot of conversation as I don’t want to somehow get distracted and fall.However, each day I’m a little more confident and most of all, I feel as though I am reconnecting to that little girl inside who was hurt so many years ago. She’s healing and coming out again…and I am happy to welcome her home.
A few years ago, we bought our first house and I began a flower garden.Quickly I realized the valued of perennials – flowers/plants that come back year after year. Perennials are like newborns each year – full of hope and promise for the coming warm weather.
The Hostas and Ferns appear as small babies right now, just budding. I check on them twice a day to see how much they have grown and revival in there sprouts and unfolding leaves as I feel myself also awakening from winter’s long slumber.And the bulbs – I planted English Bluebells last fall and can’t wait to see how they do…
Why do I love these plants so? – because they remind of possibilities and unseen forces.Much of what happens in life is about timing, waiting and trust.
The Hostas and Ferns sprout when the earth is warming up from snowy days gone by.They may even have to survive another storm or two before they can be assured of warmer days.And that is the other part of their magic – the perennials weather the storms.Their tender shoots somehow manage and thrive under a sudden blanket of seven inches of snow - only to melt away on the morrow.These seemingly vulnerable newborns are not.
They are in fact hardy and resourceful – if leaves die, they grow more.They are not deterred when bad weather comes their way, just steady.They will be here after the storm, spouting new growth and trusting in warmer days…
Before I had children I swore I would never have a baby with a snotty face…then I came face to face teething.Teething, wailing resistance and snot won.It was the beginning of my understanding that I knew less.Those damn baby books didn’t in fact know everything.
The difficult part of this discovery was – there wasn’t a manual.I realized I would be always be ‘slightly bumbling through’ – adjusting as we go.Happily, I like it.Being a mom has been a great opportunity to learn flexibility.Some days I am better at it then others.So it goes…but motherhood has informed my life and my heart in ways I never imagined.Happy Mother’s Day to you.
There are times in your life when you may feel as though you are stumbling through, destination unknown.Maybe you are.And then time passes and you begin to see the stumbling was really moving you forward to a truth or goal that had not yet been revealed.
Years ago I received great advice – take one step each day toward your goal.Of course, the “goal” may be defined differently during the many phases of your life, but it is that forward energy that is most important.This energy drives your ability to gently expand into your fullest self easily and effortlessly.
It’s ok that there are periods in your life when you are confused.In fact, expect it.But know this is a phase.As annoying as this truth is, confusion is an opportunity.Confusion usually stems from some need inside of you not being met whether you are consciously aware of this or not.
Try journaling or reading about places or people that attract you. Meditate. Talk to friends you admire.Listen to the compliments you are receiving in your life right now.And most of all - move toward your dreams and goals – no matter what they are.
One step, each day.Read an article.Make a phone call. Send an email.Take a class. Create something.
When you focus on your goals and desires (even the fleeting ones!), you focus on what you want in life – not a negative, self-defeating idea of what you don’t want.Your thoughts direct your words and your words create your deeds.Your deeds are your life.
It all begins at the same place – choice.Free will.You chose to take that step each day or not.So, what are your thoughts creating in your life today?Is it leading to your goals or not?
Why are some people happy and others not?There are certain factors that contribute to one’s ability to be “happy” under most circumstances.These are a few…
1.Flexibility.The old saying “once you make a plan, God laughs,” has proven true time and time again in my own life.Being able to adjust to changing life events, even as minor as dinner plans, with flexibility and ease leads directly to happiness.Why?Flexibility means forsaking control – willingly.Quite a feat to be sure, but a gift - only to be received if you are willing to give up control first.
2.Don’t take it personally.As my father wisely once said, “Some people are just a@@holes.”You can be assured in your life that your will encounter some real “pains in the bottom”, difficult situations, unfairness, and other assorted crap.Promise.And the person sitting next to you, same thing.The same goes with any other person you meet in your life too.We are all stumbling through at times.So, relax, take a breath and imagine what you would like to happen in whatever situation is causing you difficulty.Focusing on what you want enables you to emerge from any frustration with clarity.
3.Humor.Once you are able to either laugh at yourself or whatever the situation, you bring lightness to your heart.Laughter feels good.Watch funny movies, read amusing books, talk to a friend who always makes you laugh, go bowling.Just by adding more laughter to your life and you will notice, gently a quiet lightness entering your thoughts and being.
4.Positive attitude.I am not suggesting to live like some annoying, over-the-top Polly-Anna, but to live your life on the foundation that, “all is well.”This isn’t to deny there are problems or tragedies in life, but it does focus on solutions instead of the difficulties.
5.Gratitude.Happy people are reminded each day of their blessings – the good and the difficult.As much as it drives me nuts, challenges are opportunities.Opportunities to learn, to grow and most importantly, to know yourself better.True gratitude is born out of compassion – just as much for yourself as others.
6.Confidence.Not swaggering, but a calm knowing of ones own abilities.Confidence also means knowing you will stumble on occasion, but the confident person knows not to make a habit of it.
7.Presence.Happy people live right now, in this moment – not dreaming about yesterday or fantasying about tomorrow.Here and now - laughing about the things that others might be frustrated by, and knowing all is well…
8.Choice.All happy people know happiness is a choice.Some days it’s easier to be happy, while other days may be a bit more of a struggle.However, knowing that you have the choice to lift yourself up or push yourself down – often leads to better decisions.
Happiness is not derived from one isolated event, but by attitudes and beliefs.Gratefully, like choice, each of us has the power to change our attitudes and beliefs with time and attention.
Happiness isn’t for someone else, it’s for you.It is for each one of us to sink deeply into the happiness of this moment, however mundane the pleasures.May you discover happiness already waits for you, deep within.
